I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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