Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
