You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize