thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i think i have herpe
just one?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I feel like death gave me a hand job
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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