kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
