...so i touched it.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
