Midget sex pt 2 tonight
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
