We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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