no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize