Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
