hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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