I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
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