Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
