haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize