Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
