So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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