Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
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