Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
