Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
