its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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