You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
