u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
