is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
