i don't like sucking hair
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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