Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
accomplished twins. life is a go
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize