I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
