Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
