Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
