so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Randomize