so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
