I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
