CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
