I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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