is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
my being single is dangerous.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
