i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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