YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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