Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
