Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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