in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize