I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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