i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Welp...herpes.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
