I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
