Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize