Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
