i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
