I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
