I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
