She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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