I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
The adults are the big ones right?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
