the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
