did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
